LARA CROFT’S BED - RPG giant Square Enix has announced a take over of Tomb Raider company Eidos. They will also pick up Danish Hitman developer IO Interactive. Eidos bought IOI from EA games shorty after the release of stelar title Freedom Fighters stating “The game was too good to invest in, we need products with lower quality.”
Square Enix president Sephiroth was quoted on saying “Yeah we bought Eidos, that Laura has great hips, I wish mine where like her’s, but you know me and those mini candy bars. Who doesn’t love dark chocolate nuts? ” I asked about a sequel to bomb and Jeff Gerstmann killer Kane and Lynch “Mmmm mmm” he said “Didn’t they make Kane and Lynch instead of Freedom Fighters 2? Oh no child, you will never see that game again.
So what will we get from an RPG company who will now make action games? “We’re thinking about making Lara into a man” Sephiroth said with a grin “The whole metro thing, it works well with Final Fantasy”
We’ll be sure to keep an eye on what this unique merger will bring us. And now, here’s a little Sting to play us out.
From: http://www.gamespot.com/news/6204564.html?tag=result;title;7
WALL STREET - Looking for an interview on today’s economic crisis I stumbled upon a man with a great sword amongst the tiny men hunched over in suits, intrigued I asked to interview him. “What is your name?” I inquired. In a quiet but troubled voice, he responded “Cloud Strife”. Shocked I grabbed my microphone.
